2010 was a year where I think I discovered new things about myself or I guess I finally grew up. I learned to control my emotions, and many a times, I didn't feel any emotions.
I finished school, I spent 3 months doing absolutely nothing and sleeping 12 hours a day, I started working and traveling (still doing that), living off a suitcase, and towards the end of it I started saying good-byes. There is this weird feeling associated with growing up that came in 2010. There is this sense of nostalgia that came with 2010. And most of all there is the "learning to be alone" syndrome that came with 2010.
In 2010 came the realization that it's hard to make those deep friendships after a certain point in your life. I realized how friends that I made in freshman year still know me best, still read me best and still are closest to my heart. I realize no many how many more people I meet, I hang out with, become friends with, at the end of the day those are the people I want to see in my life forever.
In 2010 came the realization that those people won't stay with me forever. They are leaving, finding their own lives, and saying good-bye is becoming harder every day.
I don't miss the home works, or the early morning classes, I love working. But I miss those relationships, those people, those friends, some of whom have drifted away but still never leave my mind.
In 2010 came a lot of changes, just one thing didn't change, which should have changed. Still wondering how much more time...
So in 2011 this is what I want to do:
- I don't want to write a 'One Year Later' post again.
- I want to go home and see my parents I want to prove distance doesn't hurt friendships
- I want to be alone but not lonely
- I want to be as happy as I am at work I want to feel some emotions. I think I lost too many
I don't have any resolutions. I am just hoping for time to do its tricks as usual.
